Last year, I wrote a short story wherein I made a slightly inappropriate reference to a tribble*.

After I turned in said story, I received an email from someone who had the power to kill the story. She said she wasn’t sure anyone would get the tribble joke.

Now, here’s what went through my head in order of appearance:

1) Who doesn’t know what a tribble is?
2) OMG I hope she doesn’t make me take out that joke. It’s one of the funniest lines in the story.
3) Wait. Seriously? Who’s never heard of a tribble?

I’m fairly certain the majority of Orbit’s readers know exactly what I mean when I mention tribbles. Further, I’d expect anyone out there who doesn’t get the reference would Google it. Those of you who don’t understand both tribble and Google, well, welcome to 2009! We’ve been waiting for you.

Now, to my point. When I write, I tend to expect that most of my readers are reasonably intelligent.** So, if we can assume readers are smart, isn’t it also reasonable to assume that if they don’t know a cultural reference they’ll look it up?  Or at worst, ignore it?

But what about foreign phrases or big words? Another word usage issue I’ve been called on is the phrase vagina dentata.*** Now, since phrase isn’t commonly bandied about at the typical water cooler and it’s Latin to boot, I’d assume some people don’t know what it means (see footnote).

But in my mind, this just underlines my point.

Isn’t part of the joy of reading to learn new words, ideas and concepts? To my thinking, it’s not my responsibility to write at an elementary school level. First, my books aren’t for kids. Second, it would be impossible for me to write books appropriate for kids since so many words I use would get their mouths washed out with soap. Or perhaps that’s proof I do write at a childish level, after all. But let’s not get sidetracked by a discussion about my (lack of) maturity.

The point is, I don’t think writers should have to change carefully chosen words just in case someone might have to look it up. And I’m assuming most of you–already avid readers–would resent your favorite authors favoring monosyllabic words for the same reason.

But you know what they say about assumptions … And if you don’t, well, please refer to the aforementioned Google.

P.S. In case you’re wondering, the tribble reference stayed in the story, but was modified to include the phrase “from Star Trek.” This change still bugs me. As for vagina dentata, I changed it to the more colorful “fanged vagina,” which I think we can all agree is a pretty awesome substitution.

*Okay, it was more than slightly inappropriate, but that’s not neither here nor there with regard to the point of this post.

** One could question this supposition on the basis that reading me in the first place brings one’s IQ into question, but that’s a topic for Amazon reviewers to duke out.

***Please Google the term “Star Wars Saarlacc images” to get an idea.